Firstly I want you to stop worrying. So you can’t seem to hold down a job, but some people aren’t cut out for ‘proper jobs’. And besides you don’t always get fired.
I know it’s hard as you wait for your true passion to become your career. I see the fear in your eyes when I look in the mirror, but fear is something we should harness to drive ourselves forward. As a writer you must learn to use every emotion positively, no matter how defeated you feel. Rejection is a part of your process. With every rejection letter you receive your resolve must strengthen. If you keep believing that you’ll make it, you will.
At times we all wish we had a crystal ball and could reassure ourselves by seeing the future but where’s the fun in that? What you can see is your love of writing and your determination to succeed. That’s the only future you need to know. It’s the future you will get if you keep going and keep fighting.
In the end the reward will outweigh the casualty of your battle. The feeling of euphoria when you succeed with quash any despair of rejection. Your heart will be full of pride not fear and then you will continue to go from strength to strength.
I’m not saying it will ever be easy. I wish I was, but easy isn’t your path. If you wanted easy you should have been much better at making tea and that boss might have encouraged you not to resign rather than thrown you a leaving party with a bit too much enthusiasm. So easy it’s not, but then you always liked a challenge and this is your own personal mountain which you’ll climb. You will; you are doing what you love and that will shine through and beat everything else in the end. Because with it you can never be beaten.